…in Seattle.

I leave for Seattle tomorrow for three days. I can’t wait. Lately I’ve been missing it so much, especially in the summer, which is amazing in the Northwest.

Plus the added bonus of seeing my friends and my cat, Dail. Yum, I can taste and smell Seattle right now.

You can’t really tell from this lame picture but last week we had the
most beautiful moon over San Francisco. It hung low and fat in the
night sky like a glowing yellow orange. I took this picture with my
Treo 650 and while it’s not that great you can get some idea of how
cool it was.

We’re ticked off at the way you’ve treated California, and we’ve decided
we’re leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we’re taking the other
Blue States with us.

In case you aren’t aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington,
Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and the entire Northeast. We
believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to
the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly:

You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research
and the best beaches.

We get Elliot Spitzer. You get Ken Lay.

We get the Statue of Liberty. You get OpryLand. We get Intel and
Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Ole’ Miss.

We get 85 percent of America’s venture capital and entrepreneurs. You
get Alabama. We get two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red
states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian
Coalition’s, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single
moms.

Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war,
and we’re going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need
people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they’re
apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don’t care if
you don’t show pictures of their children’s caskets coming home. We do wish
you success in Iraq, and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we’re not willing
to spend our resources in Bush’s Quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of
the country’s fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple and
lettuce, 92 percent of the nation’s fresh fruit, 95 percent of America’s quality
wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90 percent of all cheese,
90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all
living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister
schools, plus Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT.

With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88
percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs),
92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90
percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists,
virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University,
Clemson and the University of Georgia.

We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you.

Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was
actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred unless
we’re discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that
evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved in 9/11
and 61 percent of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher
morals then we lefties.

By the way, we’re taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed
they grow in Mexico.

I
seem to remember that Oprah had previously claimed some shop in either
New York or Chicago denied her entrance because she’s black.

So I wasn’t surprised to hear the sad story of Oprah wanting to shop at Hermes
in Paris after the store had closed and being denied the right to shop
after hours, allegedly because they had recently been having a problem
with “North Africans”. I know the pain Oprah must have felt when she
wasn’t allowed to shop at Hermes after the store had closed, I myself
have been banned from shopping there by my boyfriend after spending too
much on a crocodile address book.

Still, there’s more than meets
the eye to this story. According to security camera footage from the
incident Oprah was immediately recognized as being, well, Oprah.
Unfortunately there was a private party in the story that night and
Oprah was offered the chance to return the next day to shop, with both
the clerk and security guard apologizing profusely for Oprah not being
allowed to shop.

But according to Oprah she wasn’t allowed to
shop because of racism. She’s been willing, through spokespeople, to
talk about the pain of her “Crash” moment, and she’s going to talk
about it on an episode of her show in September.

I won’t be watching. And neither, I imagine, will most other Hermes
customers. Oprah’s show targets a demographic of perky,
lifestyle-oriented suburban housewives who couldn’t afford the cheapest
$144.00 tie at Hermes, much less wait on “The List” for 3 years to be
offered the chance to buy a pink, ostrich Birkin bag for a miserly
$6,000.

So Oprah’s sad, sad story will reach the demographic
that more likely will be shopping for the latest Isaac Mizrahi creation
at Target, and those people, my friends, are exactly the people Hermes
does NOT want shopping at their stores.

My little niece, who will be going into third grade, is coming here again to stay with The Good Doc and I for two weeks in July.

I’m excited about playing parent again. It’s going to be a challenge for part of the time because The Good Doc will be gone at some convention, so I’ll have to pick up and drop off and take care of Cheyenne all by myself.

My mom did it, with three kids and working two jobs so if she could manage, I think I’ll be able too as well.

What does “Clintonism” stand for anyway? Moderation, solution-based problem-solving maybe?

Wrong.

Clintonism stands for the absolute preservation of one’s own power ahead of the good of anyone and anything else, including the welfare of the nation. And Hillary Clinton is the absolute embodiment and living, breathing example of this philosophy.

I think back to Clinton’s time in office, and what a great time it was for for the nation. But what did Bill and his wife leave the Democratic party? They left it unmoored and unrooted, suffering defeat after defeat and unable to rally a solid base of voters to its defense. Because during Clinton’s eight years in office he had systematically dragged the party through the mud in order to deflect attention from his own person shortcomings, and his wife played right along with the plot.

The Clintons have always made it clear that the maintenance of their own personal and political power will always stand second to nothing. So Clinton’s years in office weren’t spent helping the Democratic party grow a new rank of leadership and building its foundations for the future. Instead it was spent maneuvering the party and its minions into defending the often indefensible conduct of the Clintons. Starting with Clinton’s abandonment of his pledge to lift the military’s ban on gays and ending with his impeachment, President Clinton never made any bones about the fact that he was going to do whatever it took to maintain his political power.

And what have we been left with? A Democratic party that panders and backtracks, that has no roots or soul and rests on the ideas of delayal and betrayal. Delayal of any answers to this nation’s many problems and betrayal of its most loyal constituents. Because after all, where do they have to go if not the Democratic party?

Nominating Hillary Clinton for president in 2008 would complete the death cycle of the Democratic party and delay the hard choices necessary for its survival. A party based around personality never survives long and at this point we Democrats have nothing but the cult of personality around the Clintons to rally towards. But in doing so we would be sealing the fate of the party and ensuring Republican dominance for years to come.

My company is moving to another location 10 miles from our current HQ.
The move is happening the end of this month and will involve an
enforced vacation for all employees who work at HQ in Silicon Valley.
Which is nice because I’m planning on going to Seattle the 30th through
the 3rd of July.

My office is in chaos right now, with boxes and grey moving carts
everywhere. I’m still unsure why everyone is packing, we’re not
actually vacating the building until tomorrow, but maybe people want to
get ready early.

The move is great for me because besides the enforced vacation the new
location is 10 miles closer to my house in San Francisco. That
translates to around 15 minutes less commute, more in rush-hour. Fantastic news for me.

Brechi has a good take on what it means to be gay and what Gay Pride means when we’re living in a post-gay world. Read it. Food for thought as we approach the frenzied end of Gay Pride month.

My mom still hasn’t been allowed back into her house, other than for five minutes to grab some clothes.

The Marine Corp is now saying it may be sometime this weekend, they’re “decontaminating” the area at this point. Until then she’s staying at a hotel.

I did the part of the good son and found her an attorney. Not that she needs one right now but she may. Everyone needs attorneys.

Which leads into my next point. My boyfriend and I have so many attorneys and accountants it’s like we’re a multinational company instead of a couple. We added them up last night and it’s getting ridiculous.

1. A firm in San Francisco/Los Angeles which represents my LLC which I’m using to throw the monthly club night starting July 17th.
2. A firm in Portland which represents my family and I in an epic struggle to retain control of my grandfather’s estate from these evil bitches that have stolen it out from under him.
3. The same firm in Portland represents me in my epic struggle to defeat the Oregon Department of Revenue’s unfair back tax assessment.
4. A firm in San Diego my boyfriend uses to represent his interests in patent law with his former employers.
5. A firm in Seattle that represented me in my divorce proceedings last year.
6. An attorney in Colorado who represents my family’s oil, gas & mineral interests in Colorado and Oklahoma.

We also have too many accountants:

1. An accounting firm here who handles our IRS and State of California tax filings.
2. An accounting firm in Portland that handles my back tax issues.
3. My boyfriend’s accounting firm in San Diego that handles other financial issues.

And I suppose I’ll need another for the quarterly filings of the LLC. It’s crazy. Life is supposed to get easier as you get richer. Which it does to a certain degree, but along with peace of mind comes the necessity to guard that piece of mind. Attorneys and accountants serve that purpose, I just wish there as an “all-in-one” firm so we wouldn’t need so many.

It looks like they won’t.

What a bunch of dumb-asses. You have to give it to the Republicans, like a pitbull that has to be shot in the head to get its teeth of a corpse, they just can’t seem to let go.